Back in August, Gillymole Press announced its return to mainstream publishing with the Christmas on the Magothy Serial Fiction Contest, which we here at the NBTC were so excited about until some idiot who was still bent out of shape about a series Gillymole ran…what?…four years ago or something (get over it people, at some point we have to stop burning businesses down just because we don’t like their font choices) spoiled things for a lot of people by torching the publisher yet again and driving them back underground for the sixth time in so many years.
Well, thanks to the generosity of Emmer and Colickroot’s new Icker-O’s, the breakfast cereal made (and made famous!) right here in town by the tremendous “wellness results” it delivered to a test group (in conjunction with a strict program of Fletcherizing) at St. Whit Gammerbund’s Rest Home for the Mentally Chaotic, the contest was reinstated in September and today we have the honor of announcing a winner. It’s our very own Miranda Fennel, Star Intern and ace Coffee Getter!
With Fennel’s budding fiction career right within reach, we figured we’d better get an interview in quick, along with another round of cappuccinos. So here now, is the NBTC’s exclusive interview with the winner of the Gillymole Press Inaugural Christmas on the Magothy Serial Fiction Contest, sponsored by Icker-O’s!
(Full disclosure: the transcript below is not what I showed Hallie, but it is what actually happened, no matter what shows up here tomorrow–KM)
Halliday Moxton, NBTC Webmistress: So! Miranda Fennel! A new job at Nagspeake’s premiere tourism website, and an award-winning serial novel all in one week! Tell us what it’s like to live the dream. Did you happen to get any raw sugar, by the way?
Miranda Fennel: What, specifically, are you referring to as “the dream?”
MF: Hallie, seriously? There’s about a million sugar packets in the kitchen. I just got back from Starbucks.
HM: Raw sugar, Fennel.
MF: This isn’t happening until I go get sugar, is it?
HM: Well, Fennel, I want to give you the best possible interview I’m capable of, and I just don’t know if I can do that with an overly-bitter latte.
(Long pause as Miranda gathers up her coat and stomps out.)
HM: Kate, sweetie, you’d better go with Fennel and finish the interview. And bring me a scone, because Fennel’s going to need to bring fresh lattes. These are going to get cold before she gets back.
(For the record, I am supposed to be off of coffee detail now. Supposedly that’s why we hired an intern. Not that I care, because coffee detail at least gets you out of Hallie range for whatever time you can make it last. Anyway, Miranda and I went and got a scone and raw sugar and lattes and a pint of scotch and spiked Hallie’s coffee with it.)
KM: So describe your winning piece to me briefly, so that we may conclude this interview in the two blocks between here and the office.
MF: Basically I figured it couldn’t fail if I stuck vampires into a Christmas story. And I stuck some elves in there, too, for good measure. And some references to Fletcherizing and dry cereals, because, you know.
KM: Good plan. Can’t wait to read it.
MF: Oh, I can’t wait for Hallie Moxton to read it.
(Awkward moment of Miranda looking downright crafty while I try not to look like I’ve noticed. This may bear watching, but in the meantime, look for DEATH IN A PEAR TREE, the first installment of Miranda Fennel’s winning serial, UP ON THE HOUSETOP, VAMPIRE CLAWS–coming this week here on the NBTC site and in select packages of Icker-O’s now through Christmas.
I know I’ll be reading very, very carefully. KM)